(一)boyfriend wants to have sex with his girlfriend,but ashamed of his small organ...decided to bring girlfriend in dark place,open his ziper and put penis in GF's hand...GF:no thanks ,i don't smoke!
(二)three drunk friends made a bet whoever can make their wives scream the longest during sex win 1000.next day when they met.
first guy:I made love to my wife 2.5hours and she screaming for 1.5hours;
second guy:I licked my wife for 2hours and she was screaming whole time and even 1/2hour after I was done;
third guy:that’s nothing,I made love to my wife 10mins and I came twice,wipe my dick on the curtain and my wife still screming at me up to now!
(三)Q:what is the strongest muscle?
A:the tongue—it can raise a woman’s hips.
Q:what is the lightest muscle?
A:the penis—it can be raised by a tongue.
(四)an elephant asks the camel:why do you have your boobs on your back?
the camel answered:what a silly question from someone with a big penis on his face..
(五)中文的也见过这条

A guy asks hooker how much?
she says: $50 on bed,$20 on sofa,$10 on grass.
he gave her $50.
she says:you’re a man of class.one time on bed?
guy said:no!five times on grass!
(六)salesgirl:excuse me sir,you can not smoke here...
customer:but I bought this cigarettes from your store..
salesgirl:sir we also sell condoms,but it doesn’t mean you can fuck here.
(七)a new army captain inspected the soldiers in their barracks.he noticed a female horse.
Captain:what’s that horse for?
soldier:our men use her if they feel an urge to have sex.
Captain:ah,it is ok.
(One night,the captain feel an urge,so the soldier brought the hurse to his tent.the captain fucked the hurse.after that,he saw the soldier smiling outside his tent)
captain:its so hard!..how do you do it?
soldier:we ride on the horse to the next town where the girl are.
Captain:son-of-a-bitch!!!
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